Going through a divorce or breakup is hard on everyone, especially when there are children involved. But there are some things you can do to help your kids get through this.
Here are ten ways you can help your child get through this hard time.
Keep Up With Your Child’s Life
When you don’t care about or spend time with your child, they feel like they don’t matter. Your child wants to spend time with both of you. Make sure your child knows how much you care about them. Set aside time in your schedule to do fun things or spend quality time with someone.
Try Hard To Share Parenting
When you fight, especially about a child, the child will think they did something wrong and blame themselves. This makes people feel bad about themselves or sad. Try to keep your child out of fights by talking about things when they are not around. Talk to the other parent about things instead of telling the child what’s going on. Help your child have a good time when they are with the other parent. Encourage your child to spend time with the other parent and the new family.
Don’t Say Bad Things About The Other Parent
When you say bad things about the other parent, a child feels like they have to agree with you or choose a side. Don’t put the blame on the other parent.
Talk to each other honestly. Children should know the truth about why their parents are splitting up, but you should keep it simple. Plan ahead and give information carefully. Tell the child together if you can. Tell them about the changes that are coming to their living situation, activities, school schedule, etc.
Help Your Child Talk About How They Feel
You must always listen to your child. Tell them to be honest and recognise how they feel. Talking about divorce may be a process that lasts a long time. Tell them that the divorce is not their fault. It is natural for them to show anger, resentment, sadness, or anxiety. This should become less important over time.
Tell Them That Everything Will Be Fine
It’s hard to change. Reassure them that even though their schedules and daily routines will change, they will be able to adjust and find a new normal. Teaching each other about mindfulness can even help you form a new bond.
Keep Your Routines The Same
Set up structure and consistency. This gives your child a sense of peace and stability even when other things in their lives are changing. But don’t let them break the rules or stop doing their chores or other responsibilities.
Look After Yourself
Take time to care for yourself. Find healthy ways to deal with your problems, like going to the gym, eating well, talking to friends, or writing in a journal. You can even join a support group.
Think About Counselling
If your child is having a hard time with the divorce, get him or her help from a professional. A counsellor or therapist can help you and your child feel better about the situation and set up a plan for healing and hope for the future.
If you are looking for support after a divorce, have a look at this website: https://state48law.com/
Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko