Everyone wants to enjoy a peaceful, loving, and meaningful relationship with their partner. However, negative habits can sometimes get in the way of a happy relationship and cause the parties to lose sight of what matters the most. Therefore, try to incorporate healthy habits and avoid things that spark bitter fights and arguments. A solid relationship hinges on positive behaviors, so avoid these negative habits that can destroy your relationship.
- Not spending good time with your partner
A couple may wrongly assume that they spend enough time together if they live in the same house. However, relationship experts agree this is not the case. Sitting on the couch and watching the big screens together after a long day in the office may not count as quality time, especially if you always do this one in place. You can have a good time with your significant other by going out for dinner, visiting the cinema, and embarking on weekend trips to incredible destinations. Consider treating your relationship like your garden and shower it with love daily. Prioritize good quality time with your better half by reserving some fifteen minutes for them daily; this is enough to grab a cup of coffee outdoors without distractions.
- Not creating boundaries
Having a few friends come over for a visit is a good thing worth embracing. However, setting boundaries makes sense if you stay with your partner. Family therapist Michael Bouciquot suggests that couples must give their relationship the attention it deserves to flourish. Dedicating too much of your time to friends can make it harder for you to share amazing moments with the person who matters to you the most. Not setting boundaries can set you up for ruining your relationship.
- Withholding affection
Withholding affection can happen when you are stuck in heated arguments and overwhelmed with emotions. Do you and your partner struggle to reconcile after minor or major arguments? If yes, then withholding affection may come next. This can be as simple as rejecting a kiss or hug and not wanting to talk. Although you may not mean to punish your lover, refusing to show normal signs of affection can widen the emotional distance between you and them. It would help if you always let your partner know when you struggle physically and emotionally to reconnect after an argument. Keeping the communication lines open is useful for recovering faster from everyday quarrels that can threaten your relationship.
- Transferring your anger onto your partner
Couples frequently take out their anger on those they love. That happens sometimes because the proximity of a partner makes them an easy target for anger. In some cases, they assume their partner can best handle their anger and won’t leave the relationship. Whatever the source of your rage, your partner shouldn’t bear the brunt of it. Uncontrollable anger makes it harder for love to exist, and it can escalate to emotional abuse when not checked. Rather than taking your anger out on your partner, try to calm down when you are experiencing a bad day. Aggression always hurts the receiver and the quality of the relationship. Meditating, listening to calming music, and spending time outdoors are good strategies to curb rage, so feel free to consider this. You may still feel a bit angry when you reconnect with them later, but hopefully, the raw aggression will evaporate.
- Addiction to alcohol and smoking
A major part of maintaining a successful relationship with your partner is quitting unhealthy habits like overdrinking and smoking. These negative habits can mar relationships and lead to physical abuse. Moreover, studies show that stopping smoking at any age will lower your risks of heart attack, cancer, lung disease, and stroke. It will also improve your circulation and taste and smell senses. Despite this, the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism states that alcoholism is increasing among older adults. Perhaps you find yourself in this category. In this case, medical professionals or rehabilitation centers can help you with addiction treatment to improve your life and relationship.
- Not listening
Poor listening is another big killer of relationships. Therefore, you have to be attentive. Your partner may not necessarily be looking for advice but a way to share their personal experiences. Therefore, being inattentive or ignoring them when they want to have a serious conversation can hurt them. Humans have a natural need to feel loved, valued, and respected. Unfortunately, poor listening skills can put question marks on such values, so avoid it at all costs.
- Denial
Every couple goes through highs and lows. However, things may not work out well if you allow denial to take center stage in your relationship. There are times when you feel that some events signal the beginning of the end. In most cases, not having honest and open conversations is a red flag to watch for. Denying your wrongdoings is not a good idea since you owe your partner at least a heartfelt apology. You don’t have to deflect issues and play the blame game when a simple admission of guilt can please your partner and save the relationship.
- Trying to change your partner
People evolve with time, and couples soon learn that their partner is different from when they first met. This is common in every relationship. But you have to learn to grow with your partner instead of trying to forcefully change their new personality. For example, you may hate that your partner has started staying out late with friends. Wanting to change your lover in this situation is understandable, but prepare to face resistance that may come along. No matter the situation, examining your own situation is important to accommodate the new lifestyle of a partner. You can have a friendly chat with them to try and convince them to change, but not overnight.
Having a happy relationship is possible once you know the right thing to do. As a tip, avoid the habits listed above to keep your partner.