Goddamn Does My Foot Look Tasty
I say stupid things into a microphone for money. Sometimes I do stupid things on line, on accident. I am dumb.
A Nose for all that is Unholy
Will Hunting had an aptitude for mathematic equations and memorizing book passages. Einstein unraveled the secrets of the universe. Everyone on this planet has a gift, and a very good friend of mine is no different, even if his “gift” is.
Eat A Bag of Hammered Assholes, at the Beep
God bless my friends, I hate some of them so much. It’s the 21st Century, and some of them don’t understand how much easier it is to text than talk.
Touched by Anything but an Angel
If there is one constant in life, it’s that women prefer receiving massages from women, and men prefer receiving massages from women. Unfortunately, I got to experience the interesting sensation of being manhandled, and it was less than pleasurable…
He Gives Me “Kisses” With the Same Tongue
As a comedian, I drive quite often; January-to-April 2011 saw me put over 12,000 miles on my car. Sometimes I get two oil changes in one month. (And I drive a Toyota, which recommends oil changes every 5,000 miles) On occasion, my travels take me through Madison,...Subscribe: Get new posts by email
